EARS FOR TEARS

I have really bad hearing.

This affliction almost never works in my favour.

Example.

When I was at uni I worked at a restaurant. A super nice couple came in and asked me my name. I heard this as, "What's the fish of the day?"

THEM: What's your name?
ME: Silver Dory.
THEM: (Looking confused) Pardon?
ME: Silver Dory.
THEM: That's interesting.
ME: Not really.

The next time they came into the restaurant they brought 15 people and introduced me to the whole table as Silver Dory.

Stupid ears.

HECK YES!

It is a good day today people. I have my first follower… which may or may not be a member of my family – but I’m counting it as a win.

One whole follower (thanks sista! You be the best sista ever).

Someone also left me in charge of figuring out some budgeting thing at work. If you know me (which my one follower does) you’ll know that maths is my kryptonite.

At my first full-time job when I left school I ordered 2,000 (wrong number) A2 (wrong size) letterheads. I also accidentally posted $50 to the tax office because my boss gave me a $50 note to buy a stamp. When I got to the post office I was like ‘Huh? Oh, must be for the tax office - into the envelope you go little buddy’.

My bad? Yes, my bad indeed. Turns out that the tax office considers that a bribe… and apparently that’s illegal… but the real question here is… Who pays for a 45c stamp with a $50? Really?

Speaking of nonsensical... introducing Charles E. Moore MD.

*Matching your bow tie with your cat = business.